Are you a POM?
Staying with my folks has made me aware of the impact of us being missionaries has on them (Parents of Missionaries). I wish we could help them deal with our 'otherness' and being away so often.
I found this site which can be of help for POMs. Please send to anyone who it may help or encourage!
http://www.pomnet.org
Cheers
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Saturday, December 04, 2010
My top 6 truths I have been reminded of in the last 5 months.
1. Understanding your spouse's feelings is more powerful than solving their problems.
Knowing how another person feels forces us to consider if we want to add to their sorrow, fear, guilt or pain or do we want to help comfort, encourage and empower the other. In marriage I have found this to be key. Unfortunately it is difficult to practice; To listen and not speak; To not give answers or solutions; To empathize and not judge.
The very act of empathy changes the relationship to be other-center. It draws us together and removes the distance of misunderstanding and ignorance.
If you are really interested in learning attend a Marriage Encounter weekend (www.wwme.org) near you. Worth the money.
2. No gift can replace time (memories) spent with those you love.
This is something we have found hard to explain to others. Time is precious to us as we are constantly aware of our leaving to go back to Africa. It seems in the US folks tend to believe there will always be more time or another opportunity. This is such a lie and thief. We have so enjoyed our moments with our family and friends and try hard not waste our time here with you all.
Don’t let the days slip by without speaking love to those who are important to you. Sharing love with those you know need it most and build the memories of time spent well with others so that you can take the memories with you anywhere and remember.
3. Friendship not only makes sacrifices for the other but also has no recollection of time.
What a strange thing is friendship. It truly sees you for your best yet calls you on your crap. It does not harbor ill or resentment for things you did or said in the past and has your best in mind. 1 Corinthians 13 comes to mind when I think of my friends. Thank you.
4. Sometimes the distance traveled is more important than the destination.
Sometimes where you are going is not as important as the fact you are on the journey. This furlough has taught us many things, some harder lessons than others but in the end we realize it was often has been the actual journey together which has changed us. It has drawn us together and forced us to reconcile our not only our relationships, but also our expectations, thoughts and beliefs. The process becomes cathartic.
5. Small decisions display our deepest desires.
We all know this to be true. We are make thousands if not millions of decisions every day. And unfortunately we often feel shame or guilt knowing all too well how we have blown it, repeatedly. We all want great relationships and love but in the details we often are selfish and lazy (speaking from experience). To be self-aware and cognoscente of our weakness but at the same time proactive in our lives is a decision faced in the everyday choices. The way we spend our time (one minute at a time), the way we spend our money (one dollar at a time) and the way we spend our emotions (one flash of anger, compassion or fear at a time) display our deepest passions and desires.
6. Love and grace are neither economical nor reasonable.
I want to be irresponsible in my grace. If i have learned anything in the last few months here stateside it is that i lack grace. Not that i have not received grace, from others or from God. I have wept knowing my mistakes and shortcomings. I have tasted and savored the forgiveness. What i also know is that if i am reasonable or responsible with it, it never works. Love is not something I can meter out and expect good return. It is not an investment plan nor is it a lottery. It is another miracle of God. Participate in it dear one and feel the freedom and taste the joy it brings.
If you are reading this today and know me, you know how I fall short often. You know my mistakes and laziness. May you also hear the truth in these words and may they resonate in you.
May you find and give empathy, may you make memories of time spent with those you love and not only find friendship but be a 1 Cor.13 kind of friend to another. May you realize the journey may be more important than where you are going and make the small decisions wisely. And lastly be irresponsible, no, be downright extravagant with love, there is no time to waste and no better gift to be given.
For this is who Christ Jesus is for us.
Merry Christmas dear ones.
1. Understanding your spouse's feelings is more powerful than solving their problems.
Knowing how another person feels forces us to consider if we want to add to their sorrow, fear, guilt or pain or do we want to help comfort, encourage and empower the other. In marriage I have found this to be key. Unfortunately it is difficult to practice; To listen and not speak; To not give answers or solutions; To empathize and not judge.
The very act of empathy changes the relationship to be other-center. It draws us together and removes the distance of misunderstanding and ignorance.
If you are really interested in learning attend a Marriage Encounter weekend (www.wwme.org) near you. Worth the money.
2. No gift can replace time (memories) spent with those you love.
This is something we have found hard to explain to others. Time is precious to us as we are constantly aware of our leaving to go back to Africa. It seems in the US folks tend to believe there will always be more time or another opportunity. This is such a lie and thief. We have so enjoyed our moments with our family and friends and try hard not waste our time here with you all.
Don’t let the days slip by without speaking love to those who are important to you. Sharing love with those you know need it most and build the memories of time spent well with others so that you can take the memories with you anywhere and remember.
3. Friendship not only makes sacrifices for the other but also has no recollection of time.
What a strange thing is friendship. It truly sees you for your best yet calls you on your crap. It does not harbor ill or resentment for things you did or said in the past and has your best in mind. 1 Corinthians 13 comes to mind when I think of my friends. Thank you.
4. Sometimes the distance traveled is more important than the destination.
Sometimes where you are going is not as important as the fact you are on the journey. This furlough has taught us many things, some harder lessons than others but in the end we realize it was often has been the actual journey together which has changed us. It has drawn us together and forced us to reconcile our not only our relationships, but also our expectations, thoughts and beliefs. The process becomes cathartic.
5. Small decisions display our deepest desires.
We all know this to be true. We are make thousands if not millions of decisions every day. And unfortunately we often feel shame or guilt knowing all too well how we have blown it, repeatedly. We all want great relationships and love but in the details we often are selfish and lazy (speaking from experience). To be self-aware and cognoscente of our weakness but at the same time proactive in our lives is a decision faced in the everyday choices. The way we spend our time (one minute at a time), the way we spend our money (one dollar at a time) and the way we spend our emotions (one flash of anger, compassion or fear at a time) display our deepest passions and desires.
6. Love and grace are neither economical nor reasonable.
I want to be irresponsible in my grace. If i have learned anything in the last few months here stateside it is that i lack grace. Not that i have not received grace, from others or from God. I have wept knowing my mistakes and shortcomings. I have tasted and savored the forgiveness. What i also know is that if i am reasonable or responsible with it, it never works. Love is not something I can meter out and expect good return. It is not an investment plan nor is it a lottery. It is another miracle of God. Participate in it dear one and feel the freedom and taste the joy it brings.
If you are reading this today and know me, you know how I fall short often. You know my mistakes and laziness. May you also hear the truth in these words and may they resonate in you.
May you find and give empathy, may you make memories of time spent with those you love and not only find friendship but be a 1 Cor.13 kind of friend to another. May you realize the journey may be more important than where you are going and make the small decisions wisely. And lastly be irresponsible, no, be downright extravagant with love, there is no time to waste and no better gift to be given.
For this is who Christ Jesus is for us.
Merry Christmas dear ones.
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Meet Antonio Pequnino.
This man in the picture in the middle is an amazing man of God. He travels 2 hours on his bike from his village out side of town to attend Bible classes and has taken advantage of every opportunity offered to him and turned them into blessing others.
The first year in Mozambique we were bombarded by the incredible poverty and constant need all around us. Whether it be hunger, sickness or the spiritual emptiness, we quickly found ourselves overwhelmed and saddened daily by what we encountered. As we prayed, talked about what we could do and worked with the pastors and got to know those around us we wanted to do so much more than teach. What we also learned that first year was we were not good at all at agriculture, raising chickens, having a garden or micro-economics! We then turned to those around us. We called other missionaries, christian businessmen and project leaders doing these things well to come along side or make available their expertise. I then tried to connect the men and women i worked with with access to these other teachings and opportunities. For example a friend came to town and gave natural medicine teaching. Other times i would take a group of men for agricultural training...all these things were scratching the surface but making an impact.
Sharing this process at a church a few weeks ago i noticed a picture of Antonio on some of our materials and was caught in awe of our God as i was reminded of this man and how he has responded to what God has brought him and turned to reach out to those around him without any reward or thought of himself.
Antonio has attended Bible classes with me for over two years and travels to villages hours from his through the mountains and shares what he has learned. We have ate meals together, i have visited his home in the village. He has planted new churches and encouraged others to study the Bible and let the Word of God transform their lives. He also has attended the natural medicine seminars we have offered and not only made the ointments and balms for himself and his family but shares it all with his mu$lim neighbors as a way of showing the love of Christ. He has incorporated better farming methods on his own fields and helped his neighbors to make better use of their land producing 10-20% better yields.
As you read this pray for him. Antonio Pequenino. And please pray we can go back in June 2011.
For the love of God--in Mozambique.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
I'm no superman but i did complete my first 10km race in 1:00:42!
Not bad for an old man!
I do need to say it was an great experience to run with others and be cheered along the way, finding new friends at every turn and hill. Coming up the last mile and then rounding the corner to see the finish line and everyone cheered and clapped was moving. What a awesome feeling. I cried, engulfed with the sense of accomplishment and support and could not help but to imagine our homecoming after this life passes.
We are not alone and we are not static in this seemingly monotonous day-to-day. We will finish this race, we will round the corner and a great cloud of witnesses will cheer our entry.
Run my friends! Run well and listen for the cheers.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Jump
Remember jumping off the diving board when you were a kid. Remember the moment you were airborne and the terrifying yet incredible feeling before you hit it the water. Or how about that wonderful and bewildering millisecond between sleeping and waking when you forget where you are. Or how about the exhilaration of the first moment of free-fall down a roller coaster and you are off the seat and dropping a million miles per hour. Or the utter abandon the moment you forget you are at church and you are truly worshiping God all by yourself. Dare i mention the ecstasy of union with your spouse.
I was thinking of these moments the other night and how we live our lives often missing these moments. These are the feelings we often live for yet forget in the passing of time.
Being unleashed from gravity, being loosed from time, being free of all surroundings or the joy in being completely united with another. Or the splendor of true worship in spirit and in truth. Could all these moments be pointing to something?
I think of the instances in the Bible when the woman at the well understood or that guy Zacharias who waited for the moment to come along and finally saw Jesus and had a lightning flash of 'today i sup with you in your home'. Or the time Jesus frees the man of many demons--don't you think there was a instant of clarity? Or how about when Peter stepped out of the boat in obedience to Jesus? I believe we must remember these moments of others and of ourselves when we are challenged. When we are lulled into the monotony of the daily routine.
These glimpses, these instances of peace and joy. The utter abandon to the moment. If we risk nothing, be it intimacy or harm, we will pass them by, never the wiser, never changed. It is necessary to risk if we want those occasions. They will come and they will pass us quickly unless we remember them, cherish and savior them.
Jump brothers and sisters.
Remember jumping off the diving board when you were a kid. Remember the moment you were airborne and the terrifying yet incredible feeling before you hit it the water. Or how about that wonderful and bewildering millisecond between sleeping and waking when you forget where you are. Or how about the exhilaration of the first moment of free-fall down a roller coaster and you are off the seat and dropping a million miles per hour. Or the utter abandon the moment you forget you are at church and you are truly worshiping God all by yourself. Dare i mention the ecstasy of union with your spouse.
I was thinking of these moments the other night and how we live our lives often missing these moments. These are the feelings we often live for yet forget in the passing of time.
Being unleashed from gravity, being loosed from time, being free of all surroundings or the joy in being completely united with another. Or the splendor of true worship in spirit and in truth. Could all these moments be pointing to something?
I think of the instances in the Bible when the woman at the well understood or that guy Zacharias who waited for the moment to come along and finally saw Jesus and had a lightning flash of 'today i sup with you in your home'. Or the time Jesus frees the man of many demons--don't you think there was a instant of clarity? Or how about when Peter stepped out of the boat in obedience to Jesus? I believe we must remember these moments of others and of ourselves when we are challenged. When we are lulled into the monotony of the daily routine.
These glimpses, these instances of peace and joy. The utter abandon to the moment. If we risk nothing, be it intimacy or harm, we will pass them by, never the wiser, never changed. It is necessary to risk if we want those occasions. They will come and they will pass us quickly unless we remember them, cherish and savior them.
Jump brothers and sisters.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Refugee
Stepped out the plane and i was bombarded by the stench and endless mass of people stretched before me. As i walked through the relentless press of bodies i began to see the injuries and the pain was everywhere. Children weeping quietly, orphaned and alone, no mother, no father. The elderly, with vacant faces and limbs like twigs too tired to stretch out and plead for assistance. Possibly the worst for me was the capable, the seemingly healthy which walked aimlessly and with absolutely no conviction or recollection of where they came from or where they were going. The first minutes stretched on for hours, hours turned into days, days, months...and so it went. Constantly surrounded by pain, suffering and anger.
Some, fortunate enough to receive some temporal gain were busying themselves protecting it and making small walls and barricades however they could, as if those partitions could keep out the loneliness and suffering. Hoarding what little they had, thinking 'if only i can keep it a little longer'. Some, who were never satiated and continually craved more, would sacrifice anything to gain just a portion, yet still never content.
Some ran to the edges. Trying to escape what they either did not understand or block out what they knew only too well. Others tried comedy and laughed off the indignities of life and the aching they felt.
The children, not knowing anything different wallowed in their filth and soaked up any ounce of compassion a passing stranger may give them. The old died daily, some quietly in fear of what lies next while others convinced themselves this was all there is so why bother holding on.
And people wandered by, they stumbled or ran as fast as they could, thinking they could escape the reality. They were trapped and didn't even know it. They were refugees with no seeming way to get home.
_______________________________________________________________________________
Truth be told, this mass was not in a refugee camp although surely we could find them. Nor was this an account of the homeless in some God-forsaken land. This is a picture of what i saw one day as i heard a dear friend speak of her great humanitarian work. I say great, because surely she has accomplished great things and saved many lives. What kept tugging at my heart, finally bringing me to my knees was that most everyone around me was hurting still. In this world we call home it is inevitable that we will suffer and someday die and no matter what physical improvement or cure to what ails us physically we are deeply hurting people. One way or another physical death is our destiny. So why prolong it? What good is it to live a longer life or amass huge wealth only to find in the end we can hold nothing and we are all destined to leave.
You see i was reminded that we are refugees here. We are sojourners, travelers, only temporarily passing through this world of pain and suffering. Don't get me wrong, there is joy and if you look closely and get your head on straight and renew your mind you can see and feel it all around you but in the same breath we may pass and you may feel my pain. I may encounter your loss and restlessness.
Whether you are like one of the children lost and alone or like the elderly too tired to reach out any more, or even one of the capable running, ever running and chasing 'success' and 'security', for one instant i feel you. But better still by far is that God feels you. He has felt you from the creation of the world. He knows you and wants to give you hope of where you are going and where you are from and who you are. This is the plan He had in mind.
Stop with the walls, stop the running, let Him meet you and lift you up out of your own suffering and filth. You don't have to live that way anymore.
We may be refugees but we are not homeless, poor and we are very loved.
Monday, September 27, 2010
Thursday, September 09, 2010
When you reach a point when you have no other choices and no way out, what do you do?
Trust.
A good friend and i were talking a few months back and he said in the end for him it boils down to whether we trust God or not. Does He (God, not my friend!) really have our best interests in mind? Will He really work it all out for those who love Him? Does He really watch over us and care about the intricacies of our lives...
The Bible answers yes to all these things.
I think of Joseph...so he was cocky with his brothers about some dreams he had...and his life quickly got out of his control. He was thrown in a pit, sold into slavery, falsely accused of assault, thrown into prison...sat there for YEARS...helped some guys out with dream issues (ok, for one guy it didn't turn out so well) but Joe really thought the other guy would help him out only to sit in prison for more time...
We all know the end of the story. Joe ended up reunited with his father, saving his family from hard times and in the end rescued an entire nation! In Gen. 45:8 we read that Joe knew God sent him. Further on in Gen. 50:20 he states to his brothers "What you intended for evil God intended it for good..."
I don't know what is going in your life today but i am praying you have faith and trust in the character of God and see truth in His word. And with trust you will do what God wants you to do in EVERY situation.
Rest assured...He will not let you down...
Kevin
Wednesday, September 08, 2010
Friday, August 13, 2010
BY THE WAY!
As we are displaced...and going to be living in Ct for the majority of this year and into 2011 we would LOVE TO SEE YOU!
Please send us an email if you want to get together!
We will be making occasional trips to Ohio/Mich to visit Cami's family and hopefully in late December, early January out to California and then Hawaii to visit Cami's sisters.
PLEASE contact us, you never know where we may turn up...
Also i will try to keep up to date on Facebook where we will be speaking/sharing.
Peace out...K
As we are displaced...and going to be living in Ct for the majority of this year and into 2011 we would LOVE TO SEE YOU!
Please send us an email if you want to get together!
We will be making occasional trips to Ohio/Mich to visit Cami's family and hopefully in late December, early January out to California and then Hawaii to visit Cami's sisters.
PLEASE contact us, you never know where we may turn up...
Also i will try to keep up to date on Facebook where we will be speaking/sharing.
Peace out...K
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
"Home"
We arrived here stateside a few weeks back and it has a been a wonderful time of being with family, eating tasty food-some forgotten favorites...and traveling. For the last two weeks we have been here in western ohio on "the farm". The boys have been having a great time playing with new toys, riding the tractor and seeing the animals down the street. Me, well, honestly i am feeling quite displaced.
Displaced: unfamiliar with the surrounding and not belonging. I am convinced anyone can convince another for a time that he or she belongs or is comfortable in a certain surrounding but i have never enjoyed faking it. And honestly i am simply no good at it. Ask Cami, i cannot lie (even if i want to). Which brings us to last night...Cami and i were having a fight...for us it was a fight. No, there were no curses nor did we scream or even raise our voices (just not us). But we wholeheartedly disagreed about something and came to the conclusion that we were both oversensitive and feeling--unsettled, insecure or displaced. Funny after we agreed on this we did not start pointing to "you did this and made me feel..." (which is really a load of...the stuff they are spreading on the field next door)we were done, able to give each other some slack and go to sleep. It was a realization of where we were coming from and therefore we were able to give each other some mercy.
So today i was trying to get Ben to take a 'rest' and lay quiet for a few minutes and noticed he was 'secretly' putting books and stuffed animals under his pillow or under his stomach (thus making his belly rise 6 inches)and i had to laugh. I was laying on the bed reading and listening to it all (he would whisper his plan to himself) and i wouldn't even turn to him as i told him to put the things back. Of course he was surprised and didn't like it but in the end we came to an understanding. I KNEW what was going on and he simply had to obey and do what i said--which by the way was best for him.
So back to me. Displaced, oversensitive and far from home. Do i trust this is what is best for me? Yes. Do i try to do stuff to try to make myself feel better...knowing it ISN'T best for me? At times. Do i come to terms with my Father and rest? Today, yes.
Friends. Give up. We aren't as bright and together as we would like each other to think. Rest. Obey and enjoy the ride.
We arrived here stateside a few weeks back and it has a been a wonderful time of being with family, eating tasty food-some forgotten favorites...and traveling. For the last two weeks we have been here in western ohio on "the farm". The boys have been having a great time playing with new toys, riding the tractor and seeing the animals down the street. Me, well, honestly i am feeling quite displaced.
Displaced: unfamiliar with the surrounding and not belonging. I am convinced anyone can convince another for a time that he or she belongs or is comfortable in a certain surrounding but i have never enjoyed faking it. And honestly i am simply no good at it. Ask Cami, i cannot lie (even if i want to). Which brings us to last night...Cami and i were having a fight...for us it was a fight. No, there were no curses nor did we scream or even raise our voices (just not us). But we wholeheartedly disagreed about something and came to the conclusion that we were both oversensitive and feeling--unsettled, insecure or displaced. Funny after we agreed on this we did not start pointing to "you did this and made me feel..." (which is really a load of...the stuff they are spreading on the field next door)we were done, able to give each other some slack and go to sleep. It was a realization of where we were coming from and therefore we were able to give each other some mercy.
So today i was trying to get Ben to take a 'rest' and lay quiet for a few minutes and noticed he was 'secretly' putting books and stuffed animals under his pillow or under his stomach (thus making his belly rise 6 inches)and i had to laugh. I was laying on the bed reading and listening to it all (he would whisper his plan to himself) and i wouldn't even turn to him as i told him to put the things back. Of course he was surprised and didn't like it but in the end we came to an understanding. I KNEW what was going on and he simply had to obey and do what i said--which by the way was best for him.
So back to me. Displaced, oversensitive and far from home. Do i trust this is what is best for me? Yes. Do i try to do stuff to try to make myself feel better...knowing it ISN'T best for me? At times. Do i come to terms with my Father and rest? Today, yes.
Friends. Give up. We aren't as bright and together as we would like each other to think. Rest. Obey and enjoy the ride.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Traveling shoes
(These are the traveling shoes of a friend who has been spreading the love of God about 60 km outside of town. His name is Antonio and is an awesome guy.)
As we are going to leave Moz in a few days (for a one year furlough--NOT VACATION) i am full of emotional conflict. I am really happy to be leaving and going to see family and so many friends we left behind...and yet not really wanting to leave my friends i have here and the contentment of being where i feel i am supposed to be! It has been such a awesome and difficult 3.5 years. We have passed trials, experienced joy and heartache, been encouraged and saddened by situations but through it all we think we have matured, grown in our relationship with each other, with our children and with our God. As we get ready to see some of you we wonder how to explain it and if you really want to know. Please pray God helps us share and adequately describe what He IS doing and Hs has done here THROUGH us and IN us.
The last few weeks have gone really well and we could not have anticipated many of the surprises (hence, they are called surprises!) nor could we have anticipated Gods protection, grace and mercy over all our travels, provision for he ministry and health! Also the packing of our entire house into a small shipping container was went swimmingly! We are so thankful to our God.
I was thinking today about a question, you know the one, "if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound?". Well, i have been thinking, "if a blind man is in the forest does he appreciate the beauty of it?" I was thinking if he doesn't become preoccupied with his 'problem' he would smell the pine, feel the breeze and hear the sounds around him. BUT if he is stuck thinking about himself, concentrated about his issues and such, he may miss it all. then ii thought, 'how much do miss?'. Friends, let's not miss it! Lets be free to see the beauty all around us, in each other and in our relationships....
SO! Next i update it will be from the other side of the pond!
See you soon?
Kevin
(These are the traveling shoes of a friend who has been spreading the love of God about 60 km outside of town. His name is Antonio and is an awesome guy.) As we are going to leave Moz in a few days (for a one year furlough--NOT VACATION) i am full of emotional conflict. I am really happy to be leaving and going to see family and so many friends we left behind...and yet not really wanting to leave my friends i have here and the contentment of being where i feel i am supposed to be! It has been such a awesome and difficult 3.5 years. We have passed trials, experienced joy and heartache, been encouraged and saddened by situations but through it all we think we have matured, grown in our relationship with each other, with our children and with our God. As we get ready to see some of you we wonder how to explain it and if you really want to know. Please pray God helps us share and adequately describe what He IS doing and Hs has done here THROUGH us and IN us.
The last few weeks have gone really well and we could not have anticipated many of the surprises (hence, they are called surprises!) nor could we have anticipated Gods protection, grace and mercy over all our travels, provision for he ministry and health! Also the packing of our entire house into a small shipping container was went swimmingly! We are so thankful to our God.
I was thinking today about a question, you know the one, "if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound?". Well, i have been thinking, "if a blind man is in the forest does he appreciate the beauty of it?" I was thinking if he doesn't become preoccupied with his 'problem' he would smell the pine, feel the breeze and hear the sounds around him. BUT if he is stuck thinking about himself, concentrated about his issues and such, he may miss it all. then ii thought, 'how much do miss?'. Friends, let's not miss it! Lets be free to see the beauty all around us, in each other and in our relationships....
SO! Next i update it will be from the other side of the pond!
See you soon?
Kevin
Sunday, July 04, 2010
Busy. Monitor training, seminar in the bush, truck broke down, overseas visitors...then AIM Moz. conference.
Funny, we had our annual mission conference here in Moz, which Cami and i had a lot of responsibility and my spiritual life went into hibernation! I know this isn't what was supposed to happen but it did. It has been nice the last 24 hours to be quiet and alone as a family (for the most part--as we baby sat two little ones so some dear friends could have a dinner date).
Then i had to think of what to preach on today and felt absolutely no prodding or inspiration...until last night i just started thinking about what is IT about what Christ has done for me. And i read Romans 5. Wow.
Hope, joy, love...suffering. It is such a great summary of our faith, of the gift we have received from Jesus. How he paid the debt, how we have entered joy and hope. How we are now free to live! To live with confidence and hope that all the suffering, all the disappointment will be rewarded--even turn out for the good. Verses 6-8 speak of how Christ died for us...while we were yet sinners. Isn't this amazing? Isn't it our motivation to live a holy life out of gratitude and thankful service to Jesus? Isn't it exciting we have this opportunity? We are at peace with God dear saints...peace with the creator and sustainer of the universe! How awesome is that?
Friends. Live today. Live with joy in your troubles and suffering knowing that Jesus has indeed made you free and his Holy Spirit fills us with love.Knowing we are at peace with the God who cares for us!
I will be coming stateside in two weeks and would love to see you...and tell you what God has done here. Pray for us as we have a lot to do and will it will definitely be sad to leave...
peace to all.
Funny, we had our annual mission conference here in Moz, which Cami and i had a lot of responsibility and my spiritual life went into hibernation! I know this isn't what was supposed to happen but it did. It has been nice the last 24 hours to be quiet and alone as a family (for the most part--as we baby sat two little ones so some dear friends could have a dinner date).
Then i had to think of what to preach on today and felt absolutely no prodding or inspiration...until last night i just started thinking about what is IT about what Christ has done for me. And i read Romans 5. Wow.
Hope, joy, love...suffering. It is such a great summary of our faith, of the gift we have received from Jesus. How he paid the debt, how we have entered joy and hope. How we are now free to live! To live with confidence and hope that all the suffering, all the disappointment will be rewarded--even turn out for the good. Verses 6-8 speak of how Christ died for us...while we were yet sinners. Isn't this amazing? Isn't it our motivation to live a holy life out of gratitude and thankful service to Jesus? Isn't it exciting we have this opportunity? We are at peace with God dear saints...peace with the creator and sustainer of the universe! How awesome is that?
Friends. Live today. Live with joy in your troubles and suffering knowing that Jesus has indeed made you free and his Holy Spirit fills us with love.Knowing we are at peace with the God who cares for us!
I will be coming stateside in two weeks and would love to see you...and tell you what God has done here. Pray for us as we have a lot to do and will it will definitely be sad to leave...
peace to all.
Monday, June 07, 2010
I am back.
What has happened? Hmmm.
1. A big ship dragged its anchor over the fiber optic cable and severed communication for all of northern Mozambique...yes, really. We have be been without internet and cell phones for much of 3 months.
2. We moved our entire house...across town in preparation to move across the Atlantic in July. Sold the chickens and pigeons, found homes for the dogs and retired our guards.
3. Started wrapping up TEE classes, gave tests and am currently meeting with another missionary who will fill the gap while i am gone.
4. Last bush trips...took three monitors with me to the coastal town of Moma and we gave a seminar on Genesis to pastors and leader from 7 different denominations. It was great. We had a good time together and all went smoothly--even the road! The president had just visited that district a week before so the 250 miles of dirt roads had been smoothed! Praise God, a 5 hour trip took only 3!
5. Lastly we started to say goodbye. As we do i am profoundly aware that this is now home.If it were not for seeing and reconnecting with you and the necessity of raising support i wouldn't want to go. We are trying not to think of the challenges that lie head this year there...culture shock, missing friends, kids readjusting, lack of funds (again we are under-supported), but we know for a fact that our big God will provide somehow as He has for the last 3.5 years.
I will write more now that we are temporarily staying in a friends house which has internet....but thought it best to catch you up!
See you soon. Kevin
What has happened? Hmmm.
1. A big ship dragged its anchor over the fiber optic cable and severed communication for all of northern Mozambique...yes, really. We have be been without internet and cell phones for much of 3 months.
2. We moved our entire house...across town in preparation to move across the Atlantic in July. Sold the chickens and pigeons, found homes for the dogs and retired our guards.
3. Started wrapping up TEE classes, gave tests and am currently meeting with another missionary who will fill the gap while i am gone.
4. Last bush trips...took three monitors with me to the coastal town of Moma and we gave a seminar on Genesis to pastors and leader from 7 different denominations. It was great. We had a good time together and all went smoothly--even the road! The president had just visited that district a week before so the 250 miles of dirt roads had been smoothed! Praise God, a 5 hour trip took only 3!
5. Lastly we started to say goodbye. As we do i am profoundly aware that this is now home.If it were not for seeing and reconnecting with you and the necessity of raising support i wouldn't want to go. We are trying not to think of the challenges that lie head this year there...culture shock, missing friends, kids readjusting, lack of funds (again we are under-supported), but we know for a fact that our big God will provide somehow as He has for the last 3.5 years.
I will write more now that we are temporarily staying in a friends house which has internet....but thought it best to catch you up!
See you soon. Kevin
Monday, February 15, 2010
The happy slave...
As we approach our 3 year anniversary of being in Mozambique (which by the way has felt like home the moment we stepped off the plane) I have found a sentiment creeping back into my soul and growing in bitterness. I share this not to purge myself of my sin or convict you but to show you how God has been working in my life. Because if I cannot see it, describe it and know God is working in my life, actively and carefully, I don’t have a relationship with God, I am only practicing some religion and I indeed am a fool (alright maybe I am a fool anyway!).
I was sharing with a close friend here how sometimes I feel left behind, forgotten and uncared for by many back in the dear terra paterna. Sorry but even churches don’t communicate or reply very well to emails and letters. And after a while it begins to hurt. It hurts deep. These who espoused your bravery, praised your conviction and promised to support you through thick and thin have seemingly dropped you from their to-do lists and the monthly deposits which sustain your bread and butter have gotten waylaid somewhere between their good intentions and your account. My ‘best friends’ write to say they pray for me every night but don’t write more about their lives let alone try to figure out mine. And the hurt grows deeper and somewhere, loneliness springs from deep in my heart. Loneliness gives way to bitterness and bitterness creeps up and suddenly, I find myself angry and asking, “What more do I have to sacrifice? Is it not enough to be thousands of miles from family, to not be able to grieve as all my grandparents have died while overseas, is it not enough to live frugally, live days away from ‘adequate medical care’ and risk diseases that will kill my children if I don’t figure it out soon enough? Is it not enough to have very few same-culture friendships and constantly have to interpret and try to understand what in the world your brothers are saying? And language, to function in a language which is not my own (nor am I any good at)? Is it not enough to leave any hope of retiring ‘well’ and with a sense of security…these are some of the sacrifices I have made. Lord when is it enough?” And I asked my friend, “are they not enough? Do i now have to live in poverty and struggle alone, cut off from friends and family? Does anyone care anymore? Have I not sacrificed enough?
I do not believe this is a new phenomenon nor am I alone in these feelings and I think it shows possible a weakness in this ‘faith-based’ support raising system. But more than that I think it shows my need for God. You see even while our support seemed to drop to a trickle and vehicle and health costs caught us off guard, God did provide. Even when I felt most alone and grappled in the dark with this loneliness He was with me. The times when the besetting sin seemed too much to bear, He came and gave me an exit. Thankfully we have been spared medical tragedy so far. And please don’t get me wrong, yes, I choose to obey the calling of God for my life and come to Africa, Happily! I do love living and working here. But sometimes if I don’t pay attention to my heart, loneliness creeps up and turns to bitterness and bitterness…..well….
Last week after spewing these not so pretty thoughts I was able to spend some quality time alone with God and I asked specifically for a answer. Not for more support or letters or emails. These inconsistencies happen and often innocently enough….and honestly God knows what is going on. But I asked more for insight in what was going on in my heart. And here is what HE said.
"Suppose one of you had a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Would he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, 'Come along now and sit down to eat'? Would he not rather say, 'Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink'? Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' "
Luke 17:7-10
I walked around for a day feeling severely rebuked. Ashamed of my selfish and ungrateful heart.
Another version reads “We are unprofitable servants, because that which we owed to do -- we have done.”
Do you hear it? ‘that which we owed to do’.
My life, my calling, my sacrifice is only a portion of what I owe to Christ. It is my obligation to suffer for his sake. To make less of my wants and hardships and more of Him and his sacrifice for me…for you and all.
Paul had it right, in 1 Cor. 9:17 he states he is ‘under compulsion’ and will not preach the gospel for any other reward. Paul is saying he has to do it, has no choose so to speak. This I can understand as many years ago I stood at a crossroads and wondered if I should choose the college professor route, buy a house, have a nice new car….but it was clear to me then as it now, this is my calling and my place. There is no other.
We could go on from here and talk about all Christ has sacrificed for us but that would be ahead of the issue. Isn’t our breath and life owed to God? Isn’t each day a gift? All its challenges and struggles, laughs and joy, are not all these things, all these moments gifts form our creator? Do we not then owe Him our lives for that alone? Grace, mercy, forgiveness…these are things down the road.
But let us go back to Jesus’ words. 9Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? 10So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' " Remember, He had just talked to his disciples about sin and how we are forgive (and not have pride, holding back our forgiveness of those who continually stumble). Would it be too much to say possibly the disciples were feeling…they were ‘it’ and could hold back grace when in fact Jesus said to them, “you dopes, you owe me everything and obeying me is obligatory so get off your duffs and do what you are told.
Funny we don’t like this kind of talk from Jesus. I never did like the parables of the talents either…they seemed unfair. HA. Mercy given to others….punishment avoided by the deserving and those who earned something…well they are treated in accordance to how the Master chooses...
We owe Him.
Everything else, all good things, all grace and mercy we receive are bonus! Pure unadulterated signs of His love.
So in conclusion I am not as startled by the correction. It is true and sober reflection and a harsh reminder of how far and quickly my heart can wander from the truth. But what meant even more to me as the days go by is that God heard me, and for this I am SO thankful. He saw my sinking and pulled me up—in his grace through rebuke and correction, now I stand firm again. Resting completely in His mercy and knowing all I do here is only what is owed to Him. For He is my mighty king and before I become his son I am His slave—gladly.
As we approach our 3 year anniversary of being in Mozambique (which by the way has felt like home the moment we stepped off the plane) I have found a sentiment creeping back into my soul and growing in bitterness. I share this not to purge myself of my sin or convict you but to show you how God has been working in my life. Because if I cannot see it, describe it and know God is working in my life, actively and carefully, I don’t have a relationship with God, I am only practicing some religion and I indeed am a fool (alright maybe I am a fool anyway!).
I was sharing with a close friend here how sometimes I feel left behind, forgotten and uncared for by many back in the dear terra paterna. Sorry but even churches don’t communicate or reply very well to emails and letters. And after a while it begins to hurt. It hurts deep. These who espoused your bravery, praised your conviction and promised to support you through thick and thin have seemingly dropped you from their to-do lists and the monthly deposits which sustain your bread and butter have gotten waylaid somewhere between their good intentions and your account. My ‘best friends’ write to say they pray for me every night but don’t write more about their lives let alone try to figure out mine. And the hurt grows deeper and somewhere, loneliness springs from deep in my heart. Loneliness gives way to bitterness and bitterness creeps up and suddenly, I find myself angry and asking, “What more do I have to sacrifice? Is it not enough to be thousands of miles from family, to not be able to grieve as all my grandparents have died while overseas, is it not enough to live frugally, live days away from ‘adequate medical care’ and risk diseases that will kill my children if I don’t figure it out soon enough? Is it not enough to have very few same-culture friendships and constantly have to interpret and try to understand what in the world your brothers are saying? And language, to function in a language which is not my own (nor am I any good at)? Is it not enough to leave any hope of retiring ‘well’ and with a sense of security…these are some of the sacrifices I have made. Lord when is it enough?” And I asked my friend, “are they not enough? Do i now have to live in poverty and struggle alone, cut off from friends and family? Does anyone care anymore? Have I not sacrificed enough?
I do not believe this is a new phenomenon nor am I alone in these feelings and I think it shows possible a weakness in this ‘faith-based’ support raising system. But more than that I think it shows my need for God. You see even while our support seemed to drop to a trickle and vehicle and health costs caught us off guard, God did provide. Even when I felt most alone and grappled in the dark with this loneliness He was with me. The times when the besetting sin seemed too much to bear, He came and gave me an exit. Thankfully we have been spared medical tragedy so far. And please don’t get me wrong, yes, I choose to obey the calling of God for my life and come to Africa, Happily! I do love living and working here. But sometimes if I don’t pay attention to my heart, loneliness creeps up and turns to bitterness and bitterness…..well….
Last week after spewing these not so pretty thoughts I was able to spend some quality time alone with God and I asked specifically for a answer. Not for more support or letters or emails. These inconsistencies happen and often innocently enough….and honestly God knows what is going on. But I asked more for insight in what was going on in my heart. And here is what HE said.
"Suppose one of you had a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Would he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, 'Come along now and sit down to eat'? Would he not rather say, 'Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink'? Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' "
Luke 17:7-10
I walked around for a day feeling severely rebuked. Ashamed of my selfish and ungrateful heart.
Another version reads “We are unprofitable servants, because that which we owed to do -- we have done.”
Do you hear it? ‘that which we owed to do’.
My life, my calling, my sacrifice is only a portion of what I owe to Christ. It is my obligation to suffer for his sake. To make less of my wants and hardships and more of Him and his sacrifice for me…for you and all.
Paul had it right, in 1 Cor. 9:17 he states he is ‘under compulsion’ and will not preach the gospel for any other reward. Paul is saying he has to do it, has no choose so to speak. This I can understand as many years ago I stood at a crossroads and wondered if I should choose the college professor route, buy a house, have a nice new car….but it was clear to me then as it now, this is my calling and my place. There is no other.
We could go on from here and talk about all Christ has sacrificed for us but that would be ahead of the issue. Isn’t our breath and life owed to God? Isn’t each day a gift? All its challenges and struggles, laughs and joy, are not all these things, all these moments gifts form our creator? Do we not then owe Him our lives for that alone? Grace, mercy, forgiveness…these are things down the road.
But let us go back to Jesus’ words. 9Would he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? 10So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, 'We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.' " Remember, He had just talked to his disciples about sin and how we are forgive (and not have pride, holding back our forgiveness of those who continually stumble). Would it be too much to say possibly the disciples were feeling…they were ‘it’ and could hold back grace when in fact Jesus said to them, “you dopes, you owe me everything and obeying me is obligatory so get off your duffs and do what you are told.
Funny we don’t like this kind of talk from Jesus. I never did like the parables of the talents either…they seemed unfair. HA. Mercy given to others….punishment avoided by the deserving and those who earned something…well they are treated in accordance to how the Master chooses...
We owe Him.
Everything else, all good things, all grace and mercy we receive are bonus! Pure unadulterated signs of His love.
So in conclusion I am not as startled by the correction. It is true and sober reflection and a harsh reminder of how far and quickly my heart can wander from the truth. But what meant even more to me as the days go by is that God heard me, and for this I am SO thankful. He saw my sinking and pulled me up—in his grace through rebuke and correction, now I stand firm again. Resting completely in His mercy and knowing all I do here is only what is owed to Him. For He is my mighty king and before I become his son I am His slave—gladly.
Friday, January 08, 2010
A moment snuck up on me yesterday and made me cry.
Many years ago I had a vision of sorts in which I would facilitate African pastors to receive Bible training so they could then in turn go and teach others. But even before that I received my first calling in Mexico to help others know God the way He had made Himself known to me. This would be honed and refined, and yesterday I saw my vision and calling meet.
As my friends spoke in our living room and handed my students paper certificates it dawned on me that this moment in time, this occurrence is a new beginning. It is the start to something God had been doing in me (and through me) for many years, not just 2 ¾ in Mozambique. And I cried.
You see, ever since I was little I knew, just knew there was a God. I saw Him in the wind and trees, I went for walks and heard Him. I had grown up with benefits I see now are beyond the reach of so many. Unfathomable to much of the world in fact. I had (and still do have!) great parents who loved me. Loved me well and led me to Christ. I did not want for food or clothing. I never had a ‘hungry season’ or heard of my cousin or neighbor dying from diarrhea or malaria. I grew up going to church where I actually heard Bible stories and had teachers tell me what they meant. I ran in the woods, I played with friends, played football on the church front lawn every Saturday during summer and fall and hockey on the pond behind my house during the cold winter. I had so much, when I met Jesus on a missions trip in the summer of 1986 I decided to use all I had so others could know Him.
And that is the path I have traveled for the last 20-some years. Years full of highs and lows, personal struggles and loss, joys and pains, moments of epiphany and conviction of sin. Then somehow I landed here in Mozambique. Nampula is now our home and we are so thankful to live here. We have made friends and now God is using us in small ways.
In the past few years I have been studying with and teaching a few groups of men and women. In the last few months with the help of their leadership,a these six have been chosen and are meeting with me in preparation to start their own TEE classes.
Top left to right: Serafim Silva, Elisio Zecua, some missionary, Feliciano Semente
Bottom row: Antonio Rodiguez, Herminio Arlindo, Alberto Castelo
Some of them are church provincial leaders, some are church secretaries or elders but all want to learn their Bible and know God deeper. I have visited their homes, prayed with them, held their hand while they sweated out a malaria fever, I received gifts from them and we have eaten together. We traveled and shared God’s word together in the bush. These are my brothers. But yesterday they became more. Not because of a flimsy piece of paper but because of what it symbolized. It was an vision being realized. Humbly and slowly I have kept pursuing this dream that I could, somehow with all my shortcomings and laziness, be of use to the Kingdom. I have tried to be thoughtful and strategic, purposeful and attentive to what God wanted done rather than what I thought should be done and yesterday I had a moment of accomplishment. I no longer work alone. My dream to teach others has now become the dream of 6 other men.
We spent three days in training with two Mozambican Bible school teachers/pastors from down south and it was good. Some much better than hearing the same words from me. We heard challenges and practical help for the work ahead. They shared their 10 years' experience with us and practiced with the guys. At the end we each thanked the other and for a moment I thought it wouldn’t end. In truth, it will not. This is the beginning for this group…and for me.
SO if you see me crying when I talk about these men, now you know why.
FN-The two trainers come from the Infortem Bible School in Mocuba. They started a similar program 10 years ago and now have over 1200 students, 80 monitors (TEE teachers) working interdenominationaly with over eight different church denominations.
Many years ago I had a vision of sorts in which I would facilitate African pastors to receive Bible training so they could then in turn go and teach others. But even before that I received my first calling in Mexico to help others know God the way He had made Himself known to me. This would be honed and refined, and yesterday I saw my vision and calling meet.
As my friends spoke in our living room and handed my students paper certificates it dawned on me that this moment in time, this occurrence is a new beginning. It is the start to something God had been doing in me (and through me) for many years, not just 2 ¾ in Mozambique. And I cried.
You see, ever since I was little I knew, just knew there was a God. I saw Him in the wind and trees, I went for walks and heard Him. I had grown up with benefits I see now are beyond the reach of so many. Unfathomable to much of the world in fact. I had (and still do have!) great parents who loved me. Loved me well and led me to Christ. I did not want for food or clothing. I never had a ‘hungry season’ or heard of my cousin or neighbor dying from diarrhea or malaria. I grew up going to church where I actually heard Bible stories and had teachers tell me what they meant. I ran in the woods, I played with friends, played football on the church front lawn every Saturday during summer and fall and hockey on the pond behind my house during the cold winter. I had so much, when I met Jesus on a missions trip in the summer of 1986 I decided to use all I had so others could know Him.
And that is the path I have traveled for the last 20-some years. Years full of highs and lows, personal struggles and loss, joys and pains, moments of epiphany and conviction of sin. Then somehow I landed here in Mozambique. Nampula is now our home and we are so thankful to live here. We have made friends and now God is using us in small ways.
In the past few years I have been studying with and teaching a few groups of men and women. In the last few months with the help of their leadership,a these six have been chosen and are meeting with me in preparation to start their own TEE classes.
Top left to right: Serafim Silva, Elisio Zecua, some missionary, Feliciano Semente
Bottom row: Antonio Rodiguez, Herminio Arlindo, Alberto Castelo
Some of them are church provincial leaders, some are church secretaries or elders but all want to learn their Bible and know God deeper. I have visited their homes, prayed with them, held their hand while they sweated out a malaria fever, I received gifts from them and we have eaten together. We traveled and shared God’s word together in the bush. These are my brothers. But yesterday they became more. Not because of a flimsy piece of paper but because of what it symbolized. It was an vision being realized. Humbly and slowly I have kept pursuing this dream that I could, somehow with all my shortcomings and laziness, be of use to the Kingdom. I have tried to be thoughtful and strategic, purposeful and attentive to what God wanted done rather than what I thought should be done and yesterday I had a moment of accomplishment. I no longer work alone. My dream to teach others has now become the dream of 6 other men.
We spent three days in training with two Mozambican Bible school teachers/pastors from down south and it was good. Some much better than hearing the same words from me. We heard challenges and practical help for the work ahead. They shared their 10 years' experience with us and practiced with the guys. At the end we each thanked the other and for a moment I thought it wouldn’t end. In truth, it will not. This is the beginning for this group…and for me.
SO if you see me crying when I talk about these men, now you know why.
FN-The two trainers come from the Infortem Bible School in Mocuba. They started a similar program 10 years ago and now have over 1200 students, 80 monitors (TEE teachers) working interdenominationaly with over eight different church denominations.
Merry Christmas and Happy New year! and NO, it is never too late to wish well (bless) a person or praise God for the birth of His son....Pretty awesome holiday if you ask me!
SO, I pray all is well with you and yours. We as a family did a road trip to Malawi again visiting friends, car shops, croc farms (the real kind) and dentists along the way. We are so thankful the car performed well on the ruff roads, no one was sick and our cash was sufficient! Praise God for His faithfulness. Finally in the end we met up with friends at a Catholic retreat house on Lake Malawi and had a wonderful time resting , 6 small boys running all over playing, worshiping and simply being together. As we all live many miles apart it is a huge treat to meet up with dear friends.
Couldn't get pics to upload but will try again later...or check here http://camikevinupdate.blogspot.com/ maybe Cami had more luck (or persistence than I!!:)
Cheers
Kevin
SO, I pray all is well with you and yours. We as a family did a road trip to Malawi again visiting friends, car shops, croc farms (the real kind) and dentists along the way. We are so thankful the car performed well on the ruff roads, no one was sick and our cash was sufficient! Praise God for His faithfulness. Finally in the end we met up with friends at a Catholic retreat house on Lake Malawi and had a wonderful time resting , 6 small boys running all over playing, worshiping and simply being together. As we all live many miles apart it is a huge treat to meet up with dear friends.
Couldn't get pics to upload but will try again later...or check here http://camikevinupdate.blogspot.com/ maybe Cami had more luck (or persistence than I!!:)
Cheers
Kevin
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)