Relationships
If i believe they are the essential, crucial and the only really important thing in this life, why can't i get them right? I have done a recent quick survey and found the following types of realtionships.

Bending: These are the relationships we are in and love yet they aren't quite what we want them to be. We attempt to get them right but in the end we don't really put forth the effort really needed. Often because what is needed is what the other person needs and we are too selfish or lazy. OR...circumstances test the relationship and it suffers for a time.

Bent: And it may eventually become less than what it could be and is forever bent.

Bruised: These are the relationships are good, most of the time but have underlying hurts done one to the other. Unspoken (because wouldn't it be trite to bring up little things?)and issues never addressed. Therefore the relationship remains on a certain level never to grow never to provide what it should.

Battered: Now these hurt the most because these are usually one-way. The battered usually takes a lot of abuse out of love for the other and the other never figures it out. The relationship stagnates (or breaks) and either one turns to resentment or turns inward with sorrow.

Broken: Ah, the final straw. One says (or doesn't say)to the other i am through...with this...with you. This cuts deep and is hard to forgive.

Now, listen i say these things because currently i am involved in all of them and it is hard some days to keep up, to keep fighting for the relationship as it should be. It is hard to struggle for a relationships when the other appears not to care. (I may be writing out of hurt and if you know who you are write me you butt, what gives?)But please notice that these are relationships, not the people. The people are a whole different barrel of fish. and generally i love fish, no matter how stinky or weirdly colored...or spiny. I really do love you all.

I remember when i started thinking differently about relationships in college and i remember reading my Bible alot and saw how God had relationships with people, not just agreements or contracts. We like to think 'if i do this he/she will do this', or 'if i am this way, he/she will be this way'. But it really doesn't work that way does it? We are often disappointed. God spoke to people (and i believe still does), He spoke directly and often but it required time and energy. Jesus walked miles with his disciples and when he met people he touched them, you can see Jesus looking them in the eye. You see, this kind of relationship, what i call the beautiful, isn't beautiful because it is pretty or easy or always fun, but it is honest and true. It has a level of caring willing to do for the other regardless of what is coming in return. Call it love (check out 1 Corinthians 13). It is a beautiful thing and i need more of it my life because without it i am lost and confused. Oh, and as far as marriage goes for you fundementalisticals, funny when the people quote the Bible one speaks of the women obeying her husband but doesn't it also say the man must lay his life down for his wife (rarely do you hear that in a wedding or sermon...) but that is a beautiful thing, the one dieing for the other.

Now that i have taken this relationship inventory try it yourself. The thing is, what i find is although it is a 'two way street', someone has to start moving and know where you are going and after that it is up to you. It may be hard work but there is nothing like a beautiful relationship.

A truck tale (in the land of Moz)

We arrived here in Mozambique in March with the expectation we would be able to buy a new double cab Toyota pickup, 4x4 for about 30,000 USD. On arrival we found they cost 44,000 from South Africa (meaning you can get parts through any dealership in Moz) or you could buy a new import for 35,000 from Thailand...or some other Asian destination, this however would pose a problem for the future as Moz Toyota dealers refuse to work on them and the parts may not match. Huh. We didn't have enough money anyway so we started looking at other options and ended up choosing older quality vehicle rather than newer vehicle with other problems (Ford, Mazda and Isuzu have reputations for being beaten to smithereens up here). So i looked in the first city we lived for almost two months and found nothing. I could however import a used Toyota Landcruiser or 4Runner from Japan at a reasonable price (for Moz anyway)but would have to wait 6-8 weeks and pay the 40-80% import tax depending on the year and make. Sheesh. So we decided to move up north to Nampula, use public transport and find a truck up there, surely we would have better luck. Not. After looking for a number of weeks, having various deals fall through due to 'creative African financing plans' (which we didn't want to pursue)or simply being out of our range, we decided to go to the capital to look with a friend and long time missionary here to have his insight and advice. It was a fun trip but not as much fun as car shopping should be. We found a total of 7-8 used car dealers, with only 2 having anything i wanted. In the end i bought a beautiful 1994 Landcruiser. I absolutely LOVE this truck. The only thing i did not like was that it was automatic (but all 5 i found were). We drove down to south Africa for servicing and buy parts and then headed home. First day we traveled 15 hours and reached the Zambezi river where would have to wait for the ferry the next morning. We stopped at one of the only 'camps' which had small bungalows, communal ablution blocks and great steak at their nice but limited restaurant. Did i mention we were not sore or physically fatigued from the drive. Truly a great traveling car (hey, what car isn't that has a built in fridge between the two front seats!).
Side note. The 'interstate' here is at best a two lane paved road and at worst a gravel and water eroded mess (oh, and rainy season the road disappears). Sometimes there are detours which wind through the hillside only to see in the distance the bridge standing finished wanting it's ramps! Another thing is there is A LOT of construction and roads built a few years ago are subject to wash out and serious potholes. And once one crosses the ferry generally the roads only get worse, fuel is harder to find and stops are fewer and farther between. Although the road seems to be improving slowly.
Okay, back to truck. So i got it home and all was well. We were happy. Then after two months the transmission started to sound funny and one week later finally quit. I went to Toyota dealer and was told they don't touch imports (knew that but couldn't hurt for asking). I went to another mechanic and he said he had not worked on an automatic and in fact neither the dealer or the mechanic knew of anyone in Moz (yes, the entire country) which had experience with them! But my mechanic had a better idea. Take the tranny out, all one piece, send to Joberg and have it professionally done there then sent back and reinstalled. Simple. Only wait 6 weeks or so. Well. The first problem was getting it there. To fly it down was an option but the only reasonable one was completely booked for the month. To DHL/UPS would have been astronomical so we started asking around and low and behold a team which had come up from Joberg to help some missionaries were willing to put it in the back of their truck and take it down! Wow. Miracle number one. Unfortunately their truck broke on the way and they had to get friends to rescue them from Joberg and carry their truck and trailer back. So it got there. The repair was done--basically replacing everything inside. Oh,i forgot to mention they had to order the parts from Japan because it wasn't one of the 10 types they had parts for there in South Africa, it was one of the other 16 other types of automatic transmissions! Oh, and then when it did arrive the Toyota dealer 'lost it' so we had to start over again! We finally did receive the part, the repair was done within 3 day and it was crated and ready for transport. This was after more than 3 months of waiting for it to be repaired.
If you haven't already thought it, it is fair to think 'what was this guy thinking buying an automatic in Mozambique?'. Well, you are right but i did have a plan. We figured on a trip down to SA in the coming year we would have it looked over and possibly overhauled. We just thought we had more time. But, thankfully, and i mean that, it broke in our back yard and not on bush trip 100's of kilometers from nowhere with the children in the back seat!(Landcruiser is, even automatic, very popular up here and there are at least 20 in town, 6 owned by other missionaries--they all felt my pain--and were glad it wasn't theirs!).
So. The repaired, crated transmission sat in the repair garage for almost three weeks waiting for transport, same problem with the added nuisance of customs and what would they try to make the carrier (thus me) pay. SO after waiting and asking around. No flights coming up here...i was getting desperate. I also was about to head south to visit some folks doing Theological Training by Extension (TEE) which is what i am going to be doing so I started to think i could drive down with my friends to Beira, hop a plane to Maputo and rent a car, drive early one morning 4-5 hours to Joberg pick up the tranny and drive back the same day. The only problem i would have to do would be arrange transport in country from Maputo(normally risky depending on carrier)up to Nampula and pay for it all! Yikes again.
Well, on the way home one evening we stopped at our favorite (and only) shwarma place in town and met some friends...told them of my despair and low and behold he just happened to have a container coming up that week from Joberg! Miracle #2.
So, we arranged for it to be delivered to the shipper and prayed it wouldn't be too much or costly coming through the border. The ship only took 6 days to reach our nearest (and in fact the deepest natural port on the African eastern seaboard) of Nacala and all we had to wait for was it to be loaded onto a truck, clear customs and take the 3 hour trip here!Well all that took as long as it did for the boat to reach here and finally 7 days later the containers reached my friends business and i went to fetch the tranny. After searching through two other containers we located my long lost tranny, hefted it into the back of the truck and headed for the mechanic.
It has only been there for a day and a half but it feels like weeks. Maybe because it is so close now it seems harder to wait. Apparently now we are waiting for customs to come and check it out to make sure it is the same tranny that left the country...and then we can install it again. In all truth besides the one night when i ran into my friend with the container when i was considering the ridiculous, i haven't been upset by this. In fact we were thankful because if it happened anywhere outside of town...or in he bush it would have been horrific trying to find a tow and if we had waited to have it done in Joberg during a family trip we would have waited at least 3 weeks for the parts if not 6, everyday paying for housing, food, car rental....that would not have been cheap. If the tranny had gone now we would have been in trouble and not able to do some traveling i had planned as well as visits to other mission works around the north. So in the end...which i think this is, we are glad it happened when and where and how it did.

Postscript.
The truck has been in the garage here for one week and still it is not running. I am doubting the abilities...and desire of the mechanic to get my truck back up to snuff. It is together and everything is in the right place (as it appears to me) but they are unable to get any electrical current! Ugh. So, now after another few days of waiting the mechanic calls in a electrician and finds that a rat had been happily living and eating the wires of the truck and one of the batteries was flat. So...we shall see but one more day and i will get my car back????

OKAY FOLKS, I AM GOING TO PICK UP MY TRUCK IN 30 MINUTES!
You heard me, it is ready and running great. Funny thing, the problem after calling various other mechanics and electricians here in town to figure out why it was not starting it turned out one of the helpers put the battery ON TOP OF two cables, so they were never connecting! HA! I don't know if the boss was as amused bu i sure was.

Went into shop on June 28th, 2007 and is leaving shop on November 9, 2007.

Hallelujah and amen!