Have you ever been scared, i mean really scared?

A few weeks ago i had some chest pain and after it persisted for a number of days i went to my doctor. Well, my dr. was great and said he didn't think it was anything serious but thought i should have a chest x-ray anyway. So, x-ray done, got the results and....'oh, we found a spot on your thorax (chest wall) and the radiologist thinks your heart is 'a little too big'. WHAT? My dr. then said, 'well i would like to run some more tests'...so chest ct, heart sonogram.....and fear. I began to ask myself, what can be wrong? My chest pain increased and radiated around from my chest to my shoulder, from one side to another...and the more i thought about it the worse it got. I had days of panic, thinking of heart disease, lung cancer and possibly not being there to watch my children grow up...not being able to grow old with Cami...of leaving her. It was one of the worst weeks of my life. (luckily Cami and the boys were in fl.).
I remember thinking how can anything be wrong with me, i am fairly young and strong, i run, i have been working out...blahblahblah....and realised things don't make sense and as a christian everything is in His hands. Everything. My future, my family, my health. There is a degree of responsibility to take care of stuff(stewardship), but if God is truly sovereign, truly in control, even if i were to die, God would still be in control and present. He would still be loving and kind, still be forgiving and mindful of those who put their trust in Him.
The good news is both results came back clear and other than some very detailed specifics about my heart i am in no danger. I am going to be around for a while.
A word on fear. It is devastating and real. It can reek havoc on our bodies and our minds. What helped me the most was to worship. To focus on who God is, regardless of the circumstance. Don't let yourself be lead away form the truth into speculation.
So, off to packing....9 days and counting!

Having the memory of jello, i don't know where these thoughts came from but i thought they were funny and slightly revelaing.

If you want to be a leader beware...
-Are the ones under the microscope with all their faults revealed
-The leader usually has to check for the thin ice
-He/she is usually the one who has to pay for the rental car damage
-Is the first to be eaten by cannibels when traveling abroad
-Is the first to learn if it is a friendly dog or not (and if it was sleeping)
-That even the smallest shark can bite.
-Is blammed for any failure of 'the group'...

In conclusion, leaders are usually strong and somewhat assertive people and they need to be in order to survive the job. Pray for your leaders, government, church....all of them.