So if you had to move and leave everyone you knew, with all your wordly possensions (fitting neatly into a dozen suitcases) and do it all in three weeks what would your priorities be?

Currently for me it is sleep. For me and especially my wife who has been woken up by our teething 10-month-old we really need to get some good nights of sleep. In the last six months as we waited for visa paperwork to clear we have been able to see most of out friends, be with those who needed some love and been able to be a encouragment to those around us. It truly been a good time. What have we seen or learned?
Hmmm.
Firstly, that God really does know better. We had wanted to go to a northern city in Mozambique but were told no by our authorities only for the country authorities to tell us we couldn't go there after months of waiting. We were worried about schooling options for our almost-5-year-old and in our new city there is a english speaking preschool! We wanted to be working with experienced missionaries and we will be. I wanted to work outside the classroom settng and i actually have no idea where i will work with. It is wide open, perfect!
Secondly, i can't do anything alone. If i had gone to africa a few months ago i would have gone with some sense of having the capabilities and knowledge to give. HA. What i know now is i can't do it. I have such little confidence...i have moved towards dependance on God. Whatever happens in Africa is all God. I is a really nice place to be.

So, forgive me for not wrting sooner, we've been busy.
I will write again soon!

Hey, take a look at my new fair city, Nampula, Mozambique!
My family and I ship out on February 7th! After 6+ months waiting for the right paperwork we recieved our needed letters and should recieve our visa within 3 weeks.

Check it out (not my pictures, but really good all the same)

http://travel.webshots.com/photo/2333283890044672173AGCQeR

Cheers all

I didn't think i would ever do this but i have to comment on a movie.
I went to the movies the other night with a friend and have to say

DON'T GO SEE Mel's 'ACOPOLYPTO'.

Oh my, what a senseless, hopeless, viscous, bloody depressing film.
There, i said it. My movie review. (Mind you, i like Pulp fiction and TLOTR movies and Magnolia)

Sorry. I really wish the images would be blotted out of my memory!

Pause. Read this slow.

As some of us drift we look around. And sometimes, just sometimes we look up.

In the vastness of space, in the infinite array of stars, in the galaxies upon galaxies, in the endless miles, no, light years we cannot even glimpse the end of the universe. In the immeasurable space where our galaxy gets lost, let alone our planet, we as individuals are puny, unrecognizable, yet we live like we are all that matters, like everything revolves around us. Me.

And yet, in all this, even though we are so ridiculously small, God, the Creator of all, not only was mindful that we exist, but choose to come here and be one of us. And then he did the unthinkable he died for us.

Now i have been feeling small and lost and have found out that i am not alone, in fact many feel the same way in their Christianity, in their relationship with God. I now have been reminded that i am small, insignificantly tiny compared to the scope of the universe, in the size and scope of a God i still don't understand. And yet---and yet He not only is mindful of me, but He loves a speck like me. He came for me, He lived for me, He died for me. He...for me and for a moment i don't feel so small, so lost. I may not be able to understand Him, or grasp all He is or all He's done for me but this i can do, i can hold Jesus the baby. I can imagine and feel the love of a baby. I can get my mind and arms around an infant. Maybe that is why God sent him to us as a baby.

This season hold the baby. Start there. If you haven't held a baby lately, go find one and grab it. (ask the mother first :) And as you gaze in the eyes look for God.

Merry Christmas everyone.

My Dad and I were driving back from somewhere the other day and he casually mentioned, 'i read your blog and you sound..uh, uhm....(silence)...', at which point i interrupted and said, 'Adrift?'. That was basically the extent of our conversation. I am not knocking my Dad, he is a wonderful guy and he and i are close. Funny though, how when we go through times of doubt or pain or 'adriftness' we really don't have anything to say to each other that doesn't sound...well, pithy. I thank my Dad for not saying anything scripted or cliche and continue adrift.

I had spent the week previously driving some 2000+ miles to help with the renovations on my aunt and uncle's new house, making it wheelchair friendly. It was a lot of miles and work but it was fun and i really enjoyed the time doing something. The doing was who i was being for that period of time. I was enlightened on what my cousin Micheal's life is like now as a quadriplegic after an accident and really appreciate his openness. Strange, i think the time helped me more than them. I enjoy being a helper and not just in the physicality of life but in its living.

My Dad later mentioned to Cami that possibly i am depressed...well, possibly but i don't think so. Looking at my situation from a few hundred miles has helped for the simple fact that i am not here indefinitely and in fact, a few months or even years is nothing and will pass quickly as long as i get off my donkey and move (or row in reference to my last entry).

So as i begin rowing again i asked myself 'is this worth even writing', should i even bother to have a blog, is anyone listening? And my answer came quickly and clearly. Yes. So much of life is not spoken, so many good words, hard sayings and encouraging words are left adrift and not put to sea to another person also on this ocean journey of life. It is like we are afraid of being real, authentic or ...connected with others. So i am going to keep on writing for myself to process and hopefully find someone out there who needs to hear what i have to say. It is strange, we like to talk about the weather, sports and the latest sales but often don't talk about what is going in deep in our souls. We hesitate possibly because we don't know what to say. I believe the words are endless and need to be spoken. I also believe often the response should be one of empathy, not answers.
So i am rowing. Searching again to connect with God and fellow travelers. Thanks for listening and for those who empathize or join me, thanks. For those who simply read or take, enjoy the ride and don't forget, you are loved.